Leviathan

Title: Leviathan

Director: George P. Cosmatos

Released: 1989

Starring: Peter Weller, Richard Crenna, Amanda Pays, Daniel Stern, Ernie Hudson, Michael Carmine, Lisa Eilbacher, Hector Elizondo

Plot: A group of deepsea miners discover a Soviet shipwreck, Leviathan only to bring back with their salvage an entity which soon begins working its way through the crew. 

Review: One of a slew of Underwater Sci-fi horror released in the wake of The Abyss alongside Deep Star Six a film which proved as tricky to get hold of. Unlike Deep Star Six this one actually proved to be worth the effort as it plays like a more horror focused version of The Abyss with a dash of John Carpenter’s The Thing thrown in for good measure.

Directed by George P. Cosmatos whoat this point was coming into the film hot after directing both Rambo: First Blood 2 and Cobra; here though he calms things back alittle as he introduces a crew of blue collar deep sea miners headed up by geologist Steve Beck (Weller) who like the rest of the crew is looking forward to the shift change in 4 days. However the chance discovery of the scuttled Soviet ship soon brings with it all kinds of problems when the experiment which was being tested on the unknowing crew is soon wreaking havoc on the mining team.

Despite the B-movie roots of the film each of the crew are given enough depth to help them standout more than disposable monster chow, though at the same time most of the crew for the first quarter are overshadowed by the pervert antics of Six Pack played here by Daniel Stern who spends most of his time in the film trying to hit on or just straight up sexually harass the two female crew members which is the kind of thing that you could never get away with now, especially with his boob mug and the centrefolds he plasters across his bunk. The crew in general though are a likeable bunch with Ernie Hudson getting a few great lines while Weller is enjoyable as the lead his performance remains as diversive as ever especially in the first quarter were he seems to actually be confused about what he’s supposed to be going while his payoff line of “Open wide Motherfucker!!” comes off a little more amusing than I think it was originally planned.

Shot on sound stages in Rome the layout of the Miner’s “Shack” is actually very similar to the Deep Core research station of The Abyss in that everything is raw steel and exposed pipes but at the same time we see throughout this station subtle details such as the screens playing footage of landscapes and sunlamps to strive away the effects of being underwater for long periods. Such a functional setup of course only works the better during the final were the high pressure of the surrounding ocean slowly crushes the station causing the internal structure to collapse and spectacularly implode. At the same time the lack of sterile work areas and clunky diving suits designed to deal with the high pressure really give the film a presence and memorable look which complements this crew of blue collar workers, striving off the boredom and cablin fever of their surroundings till the next shift change.

While the monster action is alittle slower than expected to start as what initially starts out seemingly as an infection after two of the miners consume vodka they fund amongst their salvage from the ship and because seemingly no one told this pair about why you don’t drink things you find on sunk ships the film soon mutates into body horror before the film just turns into a full blown monster on the loose movie. Much like as in Alien though the crew also have to deal with the shady plots of the company higher ups here represented by an almost otherworldly Meg Foster who communicates with Beck via the station video monitor, though it’s soon becomes clear that they might be working their own agenda as always seems to be the case in these movies.

With Stan Winston handling the creature effects they still look impressive if never going as crazy as Rob Bottin’s effects for The Thing. However watching the film now it doesn’t really matter as with these kind of movies now just being the preferred output of the Asylum and the SYFY channel to actually have a half decent film with practical effects leaves you feeling kind spoiled to not be subjected to subpar CGI. At the same time the monster does have a few unique quirks of it’s own as we see crew members absorbed into it’s skin adding a nice moral quandry for those attempting to fight it as they are faced with the prospect of having to kill their friends in order to kill the monster.
A fun throw back which serves as a reminder as to how far this sub-genre has fallen and while it might not reach the same heights as The Abyss it’s a notable step up from Deep Star Six and perhaps if the tension was built upon more it might be more fondly remembered. Regardless there is still plenty for genre fans to enjoy here.

Black Sheep

Title:  Black Sheep

Director: Jonathan King
Released: 2006
Starring: Nathan Meister, Danielle Mason, Peter Feeney, Tammy Davis, Glenis Levestam, Tandi Wright, Oliver Driver

Plot: Henry (Meister) has an overwhelming fear of sheep thanks to a childhood pranks played by his older brother Angus (Feeney). Now returning to his family farm with the intention of selling his share, he is soon forced to confront his fears when his brother’s secret experiments on the sheep causes them to turn into vicious killers.

Review: Greeted with some excitement on its initial release as it drew favourable comparisions to the early work of fellow New Zealand gorefather Peter Jackson much less the fact it was a film about killer sheep something which like Wales there’s certainly an abundance of making them essentially the perfect creature of terror for this debut feature.

Establishing its comedic tone early on this mixture of comedy and splatter is unquestionably the right way to go for a film with this daft a premise with director Jonathan King filling the film with numerous outlandish or cartoonish characters including a group of morally devoid scientists and Henry’s cad of an older brother who in the fifteen years since Henry was left traumatised by him hasn’t exactly gotten any better and possibly worse the intervening years which have passed.  Henry meanwhile is a neurotic mess, completely overwhelmed by his fears so that even the mere sight of sheep can throw him in a blind panic.

Once more though it’s the fault of the environmental activists that this chaos gets unleashed as like “28 Days Later” eco warriors Grant (Driver) and Experience (Mason) trigger the outbreak of killer sheep when they steal one of the mutated lambs which soon infecting the rest of the local sheep population. Worse still when said lamb bites Grant he runs off into the woods only to return as a mutant man-sheep reminisant of the monster from “Godmonster of the Indian Flats”

Surprisingly though for a film with such an outlandish plot this film is something of a slow burn with the sheep related antics while frequently inventive are keep as a lurking threat until really the final quarter when the film really becomes something special with King raining down gore and splatter with the same kind of grotesque inventiveness that Peter Jackson wowed us with early in his career with the likes of “Bad Taste” and “Braindead” (or “Dead Alive” for you folks in the states). This however is not to say the film is a bore until then as the film frequently finds inventive situations for King to put the group in such as a sheep randomly appearing in a land rover the group are trying to escape in while in motion and which also shows us how well a sheep can drive a car.

Our main group consisting of Henry, Experience and Henry’s best friend and farm hand Tucker (Davis) are all likeable to be around as they try to make their way through the mutant sheep hordes while King avoids any kind of romantic connection between the group instead keeping them as a group thrown together and now trying to just make it through the chaos that is escalating around them. The only downside being Mrs. Mac (Levestam) who is such a fun character it’s frustrating that she only really comes into play towards the end of the film when we get to see her elderly badass side leaving you want so much more than we ultimately get.   

The creature effects though are unquestionably the star of the show here with special effects all being done by Weta Workshops who memorably worked on the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy and its certainly an advantage to see practical effects being used over CGI even for the larger mutant creatures such as the Were-Sheep version of Grant which took four people to operate. While certainly far from the easiest way to shoot the film it more than pays off in the presence that the film has compared to so many other creature features being churned by the likes of the Syfi channel and their seemingly never ending steam of shark movies that they seem to put out on a weekly basis.

Still as mentioned before the real standout moments of the film come in the final quarter as a presentation is turned into a blood drenched massacre, including one victim trying to fight a mutant sheep with his own recently chewed off leg. We also get to see one of the sheep monsters being run into by a runaway plane as King really shows his creativity in his splatter. At the same time the gore here is very much on the cartoonish and OTT side of things rather than anything coming to grotesque realism perfectly suiting the tone of the film. The end finale coming close to rivalling the carnage of “Braindead” even if no one is welding a petrol mower.

A fun little creature feature and one which certainly doesn’t take itself seriously, while at the same time not constantly winking to the audience like so many similar films such as those churned out by “The Asylum” only making this so much more of a welcome rarity.

The Lawnmower Man

Title: The Lawnmower Man

Director:  Brett Leonard
Released: 1992
Starring: Pierce Brosnan, Jeff Fahey, Austin O’Brien, Jenny Wright, Geoffrey Lewis, Jeremy Slate, Dean Norris

Plot: Dr. Laurence Angelo (Brosnan) conducts experiments on chimps using a mixture of drugs and Virtual Reality to increase their intelligence as part of  “Project 5”, while constantly fighting with his superiors and their desire to use his research for military purposes. After one of his test chimps escapes and goes on the rampage, Dr. Angelo turns his focus towards testing on humans finding the perfect subject in the slow witted gardener Jobe (Fahey) who is also the titular lawnmower man.  Starting a program of accelerated learning, with Dr. Angelo using the same drugs he had been using on the chimps only with out the aggression factors of the original drugs. Soon it is not long before Jobe’s intelligence has greatly increased to the point were he is able to perform feats such as learning Latin in two hours, while also unlocking telepathic and pyrokinetic  abilities.

Soon Dr. Angelo’s work draws the attention of his superiors who have been keeping tabs on his progress, with the Project Director soon swapping the new drugs for the original “Project 5” ones, which inturn drive Jobe insane with power and on a path of revenge against those wronged him, while searching for a way to reach his final evolutionary state in the Virtual World.

Review:  Although it might be hard believe it now, but when this film was released back in 1992 this film was pretty groundbreaking with it’s use of computer graphics and portrayal of Virtual Reality, with the film in turn sparking a whole craze for Virtual Reality, to the point were VR machines regularly popped up in arcades over charging for the experience, while consoles rushed out supposed VR titles such as “VR Racing” and the still popular “Virtual Fighter”.
 

Essentially a cautionary tale about why man should not play god, the film explores theories regarding the use of Virtual Reality in this case as a way of increasing human intelligence, which at the same time the film explores some pretty big Cyber punk ideas, while easily drawing comparisons with Mary Shelly’s “Frankenstein” with Jobe at one point even saying

“I’m sorry you hate what you created”

 

The other key reference point here being Daniel Keyes “Flowers for Algernon” which it probably shares the closest links to, while at the same time the theories explored here are done simply and interestingly enough so not to baffle new comers, while also making good use of the relatively new (at the time of the films release) Virtual Reality technology, which it’s safe to say hasn’t aged well in the years since it’s released, which is always the risk with any use of CGI, but here it pretty evident as what was once considered mind blowing looks painfully dated as featureless characters float in space against acid trip background with only Virtual Jobe getting any kind of characteristics. Still if your willing to take these effects with an open mind there is alot of fun to be had with the assorted uses which are not only limited to the virtual world, but soon begin leaking into the real world as the lines between the two continue to grow all the more blurred for Jobe, as he’s able to reduce men to molecules and even more randomly project himself as a giant floating head. Still interestingly enough part of the studio responsible for these effects would later become “Rockstar North” a studio best know for the “Grand Theft Auto Series”.

The two lead characters are both fascinating characters, with the pacifist Dr. Angelo constantly having to betray these beliefs to further his own research while, clearly caring about Jobe’s progress even though at times he lets his passion for progress overwhelm his compassion frequently pushing Jobe into traumatizing situations in favour of his progressing his researching while Fahey is completely convincing as the slow witted Jobe, with his childlike curiosity and friendship with the young boy Peter (O’Brien) who is essentially on the same mental level as Jobe if not higher, making their friendship seem completely natural, while Fahey naturally portrays the continually increasing intelligence of Jobe, to the point were he is able to change him from the lovable doofus to a terrifying megalomaniac as his power spirals out of control.

Despite being a cautionary tale, Jobe’s actions are frequently seen as more than an insane quest for power, especially as he seen being so frequently abused by the local bully Jake who frequently taunts him, while being even more regularly flogged for forgetting to do his chores by the sadistic priest whose shed he lives in, with both of these characters soon being targets for his revenge, while also unleashing a telepathically controlled lawnmower on Peter’s alcoholic father in one of the more laughable sequences of the film, while the majority of the other deaths at Jobe’s hands usually being the result of him being antagonised and unsurprisingly these scenes form the weaker parts of the film with the more interesting parts certainly being the Jobe’s ever increasing intelligence and Dr. Angelo intelligence enhancing experiments than Jobe’s ongoing quest for revenge and god like power.
Perhaps a better use of virtual reality would have been to film an established cyber punk classic like William Gibsons “Neuromancer”, but it did still pave the way for CGI in modern cinema by giving an example of what the effects could be used to create, while also leading the way to some abysmal attempts to follow up it’s success like “Arcade” and “Virtuosity” aswell as the ultimately superior yet more old school effects driven “eXistenZ.

“The Lawnmower Man” despite now being largely forgotten outside of sci-fi fans, grizzled VR boffins who felt that the film gave an unrealistic expectations of Virtual Reality, aswell as a brief legal case with Horror legend Stephen King, for the connection to his own short story about a man who eats what he mows (yes really) and to which this film has zero connection outside of a throw away line about part of one of Jobe’s victims being found in a birdbath and the less said about the sequel the better really, especially as the studio doubted that anyone would actually buy it so much, that they now give it away for free with this film. Still it is a film still worth giving a look even as a fun companion piece to the superior “Tron”.

Konga

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Title: Konga

Director: John Lemont
Released: 1961
Starring: Michael Gough, Margo Johns, Jess Conrad, Claire Gordon, Austin Trevor, Jack Watson, George Pastell, Vanda Godsell, Stanley Morgan

Plot: After his plane crashes in the African jungles, a year later after being presumed to be dead British botanist Dr. Charles Decker (Gough) suddenly comes back, while also having found a way of growing plants and animals to enormous size. Accompanied him aswell is his pet chimp “Konga” who is soon playing an important part in the doctors plans for revenge.

Review: For most people Michael Gough will always be associated with playing Batman’s butler Alfred and true it’s easy to understand why as he did truly own the iconic role. At the same time there are those who view Gough as an under the radar horror icon with his appearances in “Horrors of the Black Museum” and “Satan’s Slave” and it was during this horror period that he also made this film, which set out to give Britain its own version of “King Kong” which interestingly would also be the same year that we got our own version of “Godzilla” with the enjoyably daft “Gorgo”.

Unsurprisingly producer Herman Cohen while seemingly being inspired by “King Kong” it would be more precisely the idea of making a giant ape movie in colour that inspired him the most when it came to making this film, while developing the film under the working title of “I Was a Teenage Gorilla” a nod to his earlier success “I Was A Teenage Werewolf” regardless of how nonsensical the title would seem against the finished film. So paying RKO Pictures $25,000 for the rights to the name Kong with a focus purely on making an exploitation film, the end results are decidedly strange to say the least.

Right from the start it is clear that Dr. Decker is up to something as he is shown breeding man-eating Venus flytraps in his greenhouse lab as part of his tests of his serum which soon sees him testing it on his pet chimp Konga, turning him from a playful chimp to a man in a questionable Gorilla costume. Yes I know gorillas and chimpanzees are completely different breeds, so either Dr. Decker’s Serum changes an animal’s breed as well as causing monstrous growth or more likely Director Lemont just felt that the audience wouldn’t notice the difference. Still this is not any old gorilla suit, as it also belonged to legendry ape actor George Barrows who amongst his many ape roles also played the memorably unique looking Ro-Man The Monster in the trash classic “Robot Monster”. However Lemont only hired his gorilla suit rather than Barrows himself, only to return the costume in less than perfect condition, much to the distain of Barrows while only raising more questions as to what Lemont had been doing with the suit during the shoot?

Having grown so used to Gough in his Alfred persona, it was quite a thrill seeing him playing such a devious role, more so perhaps because of seeing him as this loveable old man and faithful butler to now see him scheming and sending his killer ape off to kill his enemies and it's a role he plays well, especially the more he gets caught up in his scheme especially as he frequently hams it up clearly knowing the standard of film being made,  hardly masking his evil genius as we are barely ten minutes into the film before he start dropping hints as he potters around his home laboratory while also finding time to letch over one of his pretty students Sandra (Gordon) who soon unwittingly become central to Dr. Deckers plans, especially when he is sending Konga off to kill her boyfriend.

The idea of Dr. Decker using his killer ape for murder through the power of hypnosis might be a slight disappointment for a film essentially sold as a giant ape on the rampage movie, though it does still provide a fair amount of unintentionally amusing moments such as Konga hiding in the bushes and generally looking like he should be wearing a trench coat and trilby hat, especially when he has such a shifty expression on his face. Still giant ape fans should fear not as the finale finally gives us our giant ape, as Konga gets a super-sized dose of serum causing him to grow to a monstrous size before heading off on a mini rampage while Dr. Decker also receives the Fay Wray treatment before they soon encounter possibly the most well prepared group of soldiers to ever be featured in a monster movie and all without the need of a giant map or lengthy discussion between Generals while they push small models around the map. So surprisingly prepared for the threat of a giant ape I half expected someone to pipe up with “This is what we prepared for boys!” especially considering how quickly they stop the giant ape threat and disappointingly before he has had chance to cause much carnage, but then seeng how the film is seemingly set in a quaint little village there is only so much damage he could really cause, while the film ultimately as a result misses a trick by not being set in London, which could have seen Konga climbing Big Ben or even Nelson’s Column swiping at Spitfire’s.

While the film moves at a quick place to set Dr. Decker and his schemes in motion, with everything pretty much in place by the first twenty minutes, it does however drag in other places, as we are forced to endure mind numbing conversations between minor characters such a Sandra’s boyfriend and his parents, which had me eager to see him taken out as quickly as possible, so I didn’t have to ensure anymore of his yammering. Meanwhile for a man so focused on revenge Dr. Decker’s targets are actually pretty minimal and more to do with personal snubs or threats on his research than any real form of planned revenge.

Ultimately the film never seems to know what it want to be as it skips from one B-movie genre to the next as Gough hams it up with his mad scientist antics, before it switches to being a killer ape movie, before finally giving us the long awaited giant ape on the rampage which the poster promises us. Still when you in the mood for a man in a hokey monkey costume this is one of the better ones and certainly more entertaining than my previous attempt at finding one of these film with the ho-hum “Bride of The Gorilla”. Still if you want to see us Brit's rip off someone else's monster movie personally I would stick with "Gorgo" or maybe just watch the originals.

Chillerama

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Title: Chillerama

Director: Adam Green, Joe Lynch, Adam Rifkin, Tim Sullivan
Released: 2011
Starring: Adam Rifkin, Sarah Mutch, Owen Benjamin, Ray Wise, Eric Roberts, Miles Dougal, Lin Shaye, Sean Paul Lockhart, Anton Troy, Gabby West, Adam Robitel, Ron Jeremy, Tim Sullivan, Thomas C. Colby-Dog, Joel David Moore, Kristina Klebe, Kane Hodder, Jim Ward, Richard Riehle, Corey Jones, Kaili Thorne, Brendan McCreary, Ward Roberts

Plot: It’s the closing night of the last drive-in theatre in America and owner Cecil B. Kaufman has decided to go out with a bang by holding a marathon of cinematic trash for his faithful cinephile patrons. Unknown to them though is the fact that one of the staff has contracted a zombie virus through some ill-advised necrophilia, ensuring this is going to be nothing short of a memorable closing night.

Review: While many may have hailed Eli Roth as the saviour of the horror genre, a title which he has sadly failed to live up to, especially considering how he is more concerned with taking on producing duties these days than sitting in the directors chair, as only further highlighted by the gap between “Hostel 2” and the forthcoming “The Green Inferno”. Infact if anyone could be branded as a saviour for the genre, I would personally venture that it would have to be Adam Green, whom since unleashing “Hatchet” has only feverishly continued to add to the genre, as he followed it up with not only a sequel to this debut, but also the critically acclaimed “Frozen” which showed that he was more than another splatter director.More surprisingly though he has also givin us the horror version of “The Big Bang Theory” with “Holliston” which he also stars in with fellow horror director and best friend Joe Lynch, who unsurprisingly is also on hand to direct a segment here.

Now the unholy twosome join forces with Adam Rifkin and Tim Sullivan to create this horror comedy anthology, an idea originally devised by Rifkin and Sullivan as a weekly show for MTV, only for it to fall through due to the increased popularity in reality shows. Now recruiting Green and Lynch to their cause it finally makes it to the screen in movie form and I was eager to see how it stood up alongside the classic Anthologies which came before it like “Tales From The Darkside” and “Creepshow”, aswell as the knowing nods to B-movie culture much like we saw with the criminally separated “Grindhouse” whose double feature format failed to make it out of the States as it was released internationally as two separate films.

Comprised of four films with each director getting their own chance to craft their own vision, as they give us here

• Wadzilla (directed by Adam Rifkin) – A monster sized man eating sperm goes on a rampage through New York.

• I Was a Teenage Werebear (directed by Tim Sullivan) – The sole musical entry in the film, set in 1962 were Ricky (Lockheart) a closet gay discovers a mysterious gang, who also happen to turn into leather daddy werebears when aroused.

• The Diary of Anne Frankenstein (directed by Adam Green) – The secret attempt by Hitler (Moore) to create the perfect killing machine to help turn the tide of the war, while in turn giving the world his Jewish Frankenstein Meshugannah (Hodder) 

• Zom-B-Movie (directed by Joe Lynch) – The main meat of the film, which is intercut with the other films, as sex crazed zombies invade the drive through while ensuring the film end with a suitably splatter soaked finale

As you can see it is a real mixed bag on offer here in terms of style and ideas, yet all keep within the general theme the film shows….one that it would seem drenched in bodily fluids and gore, served up with a heavy dose of warped humour, which is not a bad thing and certainly gives the bad taste aficionados plenty to enjoy. The downside though is that like “Four Rooms” the level of talent on offer here is varying to say the least, resulting in a film which is frequently uneven in places as the standard shifts from piece to piece with Green and Lynch easily having the stronger segments, with their experience of working in the genre really coming into play, with Lynch’s “Zom-B-Movie” throwing out cheeky nods to the zombie genre left, right and centre while seemingly also attempting to top the splatter finale of Peter Jackson’s legendry “Braindead” while at the same giving it a sex comedy style twist which has to be seen to be believed. Meanwhile Green’s twist on Frankenstein is so over the top that despite the high potential to cause offence by poking fun at what could essentially be volatile subject matter, is quickly put to rest by the ever increasing levels of randomness, which has a real Mel Brooks feel to it as the film self acknowledges its own stupidity, even having cast step outside of the sets and actors suddenly being replaced by questionable looking dummies.

Sadly were the film hits a major bump is with “I Was A Teenage Werebear” which attempts to give us “Grease” via the way of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”, which is a dangerous idea to begin with when you consider that even Richard O’Brian couldn’t create a sequel to beat his creation, so it is essentially destinted to fail from the start as any number of tepid stage versions trying to capture the magic of the film have only further proven. The main problem here is not so much with the plot, which embraces carefree gay love, aswell as the confusion for a young man still forced to live in the closet, all great themes to see being used and obviously ideas close to the heart of the segments director seeing how Sullivan himself is openly gay (and rather keen to drop this fact in for any promotional material for the film). What lets this segment down is instead the weak collection of forgettable songs being warbled by the cast. None of these song I have to confess would have me rushing to buy the soundtrack, which has been optimistically released alongside the film, while Sullivan has also hinted at a full length stage version, something else that I’m not exactly on tender hooks to see, especially as this segment is only just bearable, thanks to some over the top and frequently original splatter.

One thing which stuck with me about this film though is the continuous obsession with bodily fluids, as the film seems to take any opportunity to ensure that all feature in some form or another with “Wadzilla” with its giant sperm and tidal wave cum shots ensuring that it comes off like a more light hearted version of the body shocker “Bad Biology”. Still the bad taste aficionados amongst you will no doubt appreciate the sheer effort which has been put into this film to ensure that they are all covered for your viewing pleasure, which includes a scatological themed “Deathication”. Thankfully its not a theme which overshadows the whole film, but one which certainly crops up enough to be noticeable.

While the segments might vary greatly in quality and style, the strength of “The Diary of Anne Frankenstein” and “Zom-B-Movie” prove to be more than enough to cover for the weaker parts of the film. At the same time while watching this I couldn’t help but feel that I was missing the audience element which no doubt has made this such a popular film on the horror festival circuit and as such I would recommend watching this with a group of like-minded friends to get the full effect intended.

The Fly

Title: The Fly

Director: David Cronenberg

Released: 1986

Staring: Jeff Goldblum, Geena Davis, John Getz

Plot: Seth Brundle (Goldblum) an eccentric yet brilliant scientist believes he has found a way to teleport from one location to another using his invention “The Telepod”. However while using himself as a guinea-pig, he unwittingly fuses his genes with a house fly which was trapped in the pod with him.

Review: For the most part the word “remake” can be considered to be a word almost a dirty as the word “reboot”, especially when films get remade seemingly only in the pursuit of easy box office dollars, as the studios attempt to cash in on the legacy of an established classic. Then of course we have a film like this film which not only remakes the classic 1958 movie, but rather turns it into something altogether more special.

Considering Cronenberg’s love of bodily mutation, disease and infection, it would in many ways seem like a no brainer for him to helm the remake, as it is essentially prime for the exploration of these key Cronenberg themes, but despite his love for the original, it was bizarrely only after he was offered the project by even more bizarrely of all people Mel Brooks, who despite being best known for his screwball comedies would also produce under “Brooksfilms”, films such as “The Elephant Man” and “Frances” opting not to use his name, encase people mistook the films for comedies, which is undoubtedly for the best here.

Rewritting large sections of the original script by Charles Edward Pogue, who still retains a writing credit here, thanks to Cronenberg’s insistence that Pogue’s script had served as the foundation for his own rewrites. Here he has crafted in his own way a love story, in very much the same way that “True Romance” can be viewed as a love story, for while both don’t contain the traditional structure of your run of the mill romantic film, it is certainly at the heart of this film, which is only made clearer when the film is broken down into its simplest terms for what we have is the story of two people in love, only one of them is dying from a horrible disease. It just so happens that in this case the disease is one which is turning him into a mutant man fly hybrid or “The Brundlefly” as he frequently refers to himself, as the true extent of his condition becomes apparent to him.

Goldblum is of course perfect casting as the ill fated scientist as his usual tics and stumbling dialogue only further help him embody the character of Seth, while even more surprisingly managing to project real on screen chemistry with Davis’s Veronica, especially with Davis and Goldblum being in a relationship at the time, which would usually equal zero onscreen chemistry which is thankfully not the case, with Davis especially deserving props for making such an unlikely relationship seem believable, even though it would seem that Veronica is using her feminine charms to get the story, it is really down to her performance that we can believe that their relationship is real.

Unlike the original which is played out in a more traditional b-movie style, with more of the focus being on the hideous transformation in order to maximize shocks. Here Cronenberg takes the time to focus on Brundle’s teleportation experiments, which when we join him is still failing to transport anything living, as shown by the messy failed teleportation of a baboon, with Cronenberg using Veronica’s video camera interviews to truly get in the mind of Brundle, looking at the frustration he finds with his failures, while also capturing the enthusiasm his work brings out in his despite this as he bounces enthusiastically around his lab with each breakthrough he finds giving him renewed vigor towards his goal. These video sections become equally important as Brundle starts to mutate it, as he records each new change first of all with a strange curiosity as he finds himself with increased strength and libido, aswell as ultimately sadness as finds himself becoming increasingly more monstrous in appearance as his body parts slowly disintegrate, with his transformation also causing him to adopt fly like attributes such as body forcing him to vomit bile on his food before consumption.

Released at the height of the AID’s epidemic, the film was initially seen as a parable on the disease, but as Cronenberg would confirm the film is infact about growing old as Brundle nears his final nightmarish transformation he is shown bent double and using walking sticks to move around with his once youthful looks now reduced to a wrinkled visage. Still it is clear how much fun Cronenberg is having here, especially with Special effects guru Chris Walas bringing the horrific and gradual transformation to life, while also providing further fuel to the importance of old school effects over the CGI, much like Rob Bottin’s equally incredible special effects work on “The Thing”.

While more certainly gooier than the original trilogy of films, Cronenberg has truly made a version of the story very much in tune with his own vision, something especially surprising for such a mainstream studio film and while he had originally hoped that the success of this film would give him the freedom to make any film he wanted, it would still take another two years to bring his then dream project “Dead Ringers” to the screen. Still if there was ever a film which justifies why Cronenberg is a director worth getting excited about this is it and while it might be a rare jaunt into Big budget mainstream film making it still retains all of his usual trademarks as well as the curious charm from his independent features and while it might be at times it might feel that your reaching for the sickbag perhaps a little too frequently especially on the first viewing, Cronenberg never uses such tactics for cheap shocks and never at the expense of the story. This is bold and exciting film making at its best aswell as at its most gooey.

The Host

Title: The Host
Director: Bong Joon-ho
Released: 2006
Staring: Kang-ho Song, Hie-bong Byeon, Hae-il Park, Doona Bae, Ah-sung Ko

Plot: Gang-du (Song) is a slovenly snack bar worker whose ordinary and care free existence is thrown into chaos when a monster suddenly appears from the depths of the Han river, kidnapping his daughter Hyun-seo (Ko) and forcing him to band together with his eccentric family to rescue her.



Review: Despite receiving rave critical reviews upon its release, which saw it making the top ten lists of several critics, including (All mighty film making genius) Quentin Tarantino’s top 20 films released since 92, aswell as being one of the 1000 movies to see before you die. Despite all this praise I was not a fan the first time I saw this film with that opinion hardly changing the second time round, yet the positive reviews for this film continued to bombard me, with the film being frequently a topic of conversation, whenever I spoke to fellow film junkies about Asian cinema and it has since those original viewings made me question my opinion of this film and whether I had missed something that everyone else was seeing with this film.

Following on from the genre bending antics of his second feature “Memories of Murder” director Joon-ho here turns his attention to the Monster movie genre in particular the movies of the 1950’s and 60’s were creatures were frequently the result Radiation from Atomic Bombs or Chemicals (also frequently radioactive), with Joon-ho’s mutated tadpole (yes really) being a result of some 200 bottles of formaldehyde being dumped into the Han river, inspired largely by a scarily similar incident in 2000, were an American mortician working at the Yongsan Military Base, made the dubious decision of ordering his staff to pour 120 liters of formaldehyde down the Morgue drain and while it didn’t spawn any monsters in the Han river, which also serves as the source of Seoul’s drinking water, it did unsurprisingly for this reason spark much Anti-American feeling in South Korea, one of the themes hiding here beneath the B-movie exterior, along with themes of homeland security, pollution and government misinformation, but rather than preaching these opinions Joon-ho instead uses them as vague nods, to help ground his fantastical story into a more believable and easily recognizable and contextual framework.

Rather than play peek-a-boo with his creature or save it’s big revel for the third reel Joon-ho proudly unleashes his monster on an unsuspecting audience with barely fifteen minutes into the film, as he drops it from the Wonhyo Bridge and soon after on the general public lounging on the banks of the Han river, no doubt to down to the advantage of having a half decent monster, which he uses to power effect with a jaw dropping opening rampage shot from a ground level prospective which only further throws you into the ensuing chaos and confusion which erupts, as the monster sets about chowing down on the locals, with the creatures movements scarily lifelike as the creature charges through the panicking crowds, slipping on surfaces and destroying anything which happens to fall in it’s path, while also demonstrating some fantastical gymnastic ability as it swings around bridge beams by it’s tail.

At the centre of this reimagining of the monster movie is Gang-du, whom despite being a lazy bum, also is a dotting father to his feisty seventh grade daughter Hyun-seo, storing a empty noodle cup of coins to buy her a new phone, despite her frequently dismissing his attempts at being a good parent, with Gang-du being seen more as a big brother type figure to her than anything resembling her father, with the elderly Hee-bong (Beyon) struggling to keep his family together, especially with further issues coming from Gang-du’s sister and fading archery champion Nam-joo (Bae) and his brother the former activist turned unemployed College Graduate Nam-il (Park), who despite their individual quirks and strains caused by the lack of cash, they remain faithfully loyal to each other, something especially shown as they are forced to band together as makeshift monster hunters, to rescue Hyun-seo who herself is no damsel in distress, as she proves herself none the less resourceful as she attempts to orchestrate her own escape from the monsters sewer lair. What is special here though is the empathy that Joon-ho manages to extract from the audience, for these less than perfect characters, so that you actually feel for their cause and want to see them succeed even as the odds begin to mount against them, with Gang-du proving to be cinema’s least likely hero, with Joon-ho resisting the urge to pull a role reversal and suddenly turn his slow witted character suddenly into some form of heroic monster slayer, as so frequently seen in films which have come before it, with Joon-ho’s direction keeping all his actions like all the characters true to their individual characteristics.

While Gang-du and his family set out to hunt down the monster and rescue Hynn-seo, the military set about launching their multi-tiered clean up operation, with the survivors from the initial attack being rounded up and quarantined, while armed troops setup road blocks and begin fumigating the streets, in the lead up to the release of the biological agent known as “Agent Yellow” in an attempt to stem the release of a new virus the creature carries, though with the media being taken over and TV showing government hysteria and misinformation, it has to be questioned how much truth there is to the panic of a virus being carried by the creature.

While largely playing things straight Joon-ho still manages several moments of natural humour which add an additional layer of warmth to the family, who are frequently at the centre of these scenes, from Gang-du running behind a fumigation truck to the family surreally collapsing into hysterical mourning at a memorial for the victims of the monsters rampage. Outside of the family unit the film is also populated with humorous including a headphone wearing girl completely oblivious to the monster on a rampage and hordes of screaming people running past her, aswell as the equally amusing hazmat wearing scientist who slips on the floor and tries to cover for it by pretending nothing happened atoll. What is most interesting though is how suddenly Joon-ho switches the tone of the film from humorous to moments of sudden emotion caused by a sudden death, as frequently finds new ways of catching the audience off guard, while also reminding us how effective blood in the rain can look when used correctly much like the power of blood on snow and it’s an effect used to great power here during a pivotal scene.

While “The Host” might be a fun monster movie, but despite all the cleaver touches Joon-ho throws into the mix, it still suffers from a lagging middle section, which upon revisiting the film I now recognise as being the main cause of my frustration on previous viewings and certainly stops me from rating it as highly as other critics, while at the same time I don’t deny that it’s a film still worth watching, just perhaps it’s best watched without the hype and with the expectations built up by exaggerated reviews, for as fun as it is “The Host” is certainly not as essential as most would have you think it is.

The Human Centipede (First Sequence)

Title: The Human Centipede (First Sequence)
Director: Tom Six
Released: 2009
Staring: Dieter Laser, Ashley C. Williams, Ashlynn Yennie, Akihiro Kitamura

Plot: Dr. Heiter (Laser) was once famous for his surgical skill in separating Siamese twins, though now he has much darker designs, as he kidnaps a trio of tourists, with the intention of binding them together to realise his ultimate obsession.




Review: Ever since the buzz started with this film, there were countless bloggers eager to donate thier space to air their excitement about the release of the film, while for myself it resembled nothing more than horror once more getting lazy and resorting to sheer shock tactics than real horror to convince the movie going public to hand over their money. So finally I bothered to sit down and watch it, after spending far too much time hearing people raving on about how shocking and disgusting it was, though having now witness it for myself, I can safely say it’s more the concept rather than anything shown on the screen which raises these comments, so gore hounds are bound to find much to gripe about here, especially seeing how the majority of the original buzz seem to hint at the film being more gory than it is. Here the power of suggestion is really being more prominent, than anything resembling the extreme gore and violence Director Six had hinted at, but then Six seems to care more about coming across as much as an oddball as he can, which is no doubt all part of his intent to generate further publicity for his films, when essentially he is the same as the child who deliberately chews with their mouth open, knowing that it will generate a negative reaction. Still this hasn’t stopped the hype machine from working overtime, to raise this film way above being another forgettable horror title, especially with the production notes stating that it has been proclaimed “The most horrific film ever made” while curiously emitting who had bestowed such high praise, something questioned upon the films release by the British newspaper “The Guardian” who also brought up the claim when they interviewed Six, who responded shiftly by proclaiming that it had been given by UK tabloid “The Sun”, a claim further questioned when they also proclaimed the closest “The Sun” had some in their review was “sickest film ever?” and even that claim was followed by a question mark.

So what about the film? Well Six wastes zero time in establishing Dr. Heiter for the oddball he is, rather than go for a slow reveal of his madness, as we are minutes into the film and we have him stalking a truck driver with a tranquiliser rifle, while said driver is filmed taking a dump in the woods. This of course after instigating that the Doctor is a fan of masturbating to pictures of his supposedly beloved dogs, the extent of this love certainly could be questioned when you find out, exactly what happened to them later in the film. Still the film continues to move at this brisk pace, while certainly not doing much favour for the local tourism, seeing how one local is portrayed as a filthy pervert and it’s not long before the fiesty Lindsey (Williams) and her shy and easily lead friend Jenny (Yennie) have stumbled across the home of Dr. Heiter. Once in the home it quickly descends into what is essentially just an extended chase sequence, as Six attempts to create some drama before the realisation of the twisted fantasy of Dr. Heiter. Sadly it’s once he has his Centipede that the film runs out of steam quickly, as having blown his load on this nightmarish creation, Six now finds he has nowhere to go and with the shock of seeing three people surgically graphed ass to mouth soon wearing thin, there is a stupidly large amount of the run time devoted to Dr. Heiter attempting to train the centipede, frequently attacking the conjoined trio with a riding crop, as they struggle to adapt with the only real shock during these scenes coming from the now well documented “Feed Her” scene, but again this is heavy on the power of suggestion than anything see.

The origin of “The Human Centipede” is supposedly drawn from similar experiments carried out by the Nazi’s who reportedly had tried the same thing with dogs, but not with humans, with the closest example of these experiements being attempted on humans, being “The angel of death” Josef Mengele’s experiments in creating artificial conjoined twins. Still the Nazi link is certainly present here with fellow Centipede member Katsuro frequently branding Dr. Heiter a Nazi and while Dr. Heiter’s connections to the Nazi’s are never revealed, it is strongly hinted at by Six, which if it wasn’t due to the strong performance by Laser who helps the character rise above such a clumsy label, so that his obsession is drawn more from his aclaimed work as a surgion seperating conjoined twins and with a lesser actor could easily be written off as poor characterisation and it’s only Laser’s performance that stops the character from becoming a sheer caricature. Still if Six really wanted us to believe that Dr. Heiter is such a crazed doctor, why do we have scenes of him in his garden wearing jeans and a t-shirt? It makes even less sense when every other scenes to be about gaining the maximum amount of creepiness from this character, from the long lab coat and mirrored glasses to his obsession with keeping his home as surgically clean as possible and these random scenes take the audience out of the moment, by having them question the sudden change in style for the doctor.

With Laser busily chewing the scenery, it’s certainly a tough act for the other actors to follow, but then their performances end up being fairly limited with Katsuro’s spending the whole film cursing the doctor (quite understandably) while the girls act continually scared. I did question though why Katsuro was included in the film as if it was purely a question of having a lead character who didn’t speak English, why didn’t Six just use a German speaking character? My only conclusion I could draw, was that it was for similar reasons that Raymond Burr showed up as an American reporter in “Godzilla” (1956), which had essentially been so that it would be an easier sell to American audiences, with Katsuro’s inclusion being an attempt to do the same except for the Asian market, whom in recent years has been battling with the new wave of French shockers for who can produce the freshest shocks and certainly a key market for any new horror release.

I have no doubt that this film has it’s fans, but when you look past it’s surface shocks and the gloss of the occasionally pretty cinematography, it’s becomes a flimsy film at best and once you trim down the centipede training sequences, from their almost voyeuristic length, it also becomes a film which would struggle to make feature length. Still the shocks have bought in the bucks and with “Human Centipede 2: Full Sequence” already in production, with Six promising an even larger centipede of 12 people, it really does make me wonder were he expects to take the film, outside of just going over the same ground he covered in the first film. Still if Six can manage to put as much effort into his film making as he does trying to convince us all of his oddball behaviour he might still surprise us as a film maker, once he moves onto less grotesque projects whose only aim is to clearly offend, disgust and shock, rather than create anything resembling true horror.

Mega Piranha

Title: Mega Piranha
Director: Eric Forsberg
Released: Paul Logan, Tiffany, Barry Williams, David Labiosa, Jude Gerard Prest, Jesse Daly
Staring: 2010

Rating: 3 / 5

Plot: A mutant strain of Piranha, escape from the Amazon eating their way to Florida and they are only growing bigger.



Review: Every year we all eagerly await the list of films, which will make up the summer blockbuster list, while at the same time there are those of us, who are quietly placing our bets on which of these titles, will be receiving the “mockbuster” treatment courtesy of “The Asylum”, a studio which has carved a name for itself in recent years not with ground breaking ideas but instead for it’s knock off versions of summer blockbusters….“Snakes on a train” anyone?? Still last year they hit paydirt, with the release of “Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus” (2009) which not only was an original film (shock horror) with no recognisable film it also turned out to be a surprising breakout hit for the company, even getting a small cinematic release on the strength of the cult following it gained from the trailer getting heavy Youtube rotation.
Still despite this success it would seem that “The Asylum” have once again focused their attentions back on the Hollywood mainstream, with the forthcoming release of Alexandre Aja’s “Piranha” remake, it’s almost to predicatable that they would churn out their own version, while also not content to just rip off this film, but also the original two films, the sequel of which “Piranha 2: The Spawning” (1981) memorably provided the questionable launch pad for James Cameron’s career, with the films not only heavily references throughout, but instead basically both films, scrapbooked together into one truly random movie, with an added dose of gigantism.

Despite the fact they actually made a popular and original film, I did wonder if it would mean that this latest release might get more of a budget, which is a theory pretty much scrapped right from the start, with an early and questionable looking attack sequence that “The Asylum” haven’t forgotten their roots, as this is once again a hodgepodge of crappy looking CGI, Z list actors and err 80’s pop stars, but then was we really expecting anything else, especially when you consider that these are truly the values the company was built upon, much like legendry cult studio Troma.
Still it would seem that this time they are clearly trying to compete with the big budget action movies, of the Hollywood system especially with Director and long term Asylum member Forsberg, using a heavy mixture of fast cuts marked with “swoosh” and “Bam” sound effects, while large writing flashing across the screen, to highlight not just locations, but pretty much any character who happens to stumble in front of the camera, be they important to the story or not, he highlights them all, while at the time even finding time to throw in an occasional split screen moment.

One the worst things about “Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus” was the prolonged scenes of dialogue, which crammed up most of the film, along with scenes of the main three characters, hanging around a lab looking puzzled, as they stared at jars of coloured water.
Thankfully this film doesn’t fall into the same trap and is instead pretty action all the way, with Paul Logan making for a suitable gruff lead, even if he does at times kind of come off like the bargain basement Adam Baldwin, in the much the same way that Nicolas Lea was the cheapy version of Hicks in “Xtro 2” (1990). Meanwhile Tiffany makes for a questionable love interest and even more questionable scientist, as once again another 80’s pop icon appearing as a scientist, following the trend started by Debbie Gibson in “Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus”, which once again making the studio casting choices none the less questionable and making me wonder who they will dig up next, when they get around to making Uber Prawn or the inevitable cross over Mega Piranha Vs. Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus.….Personally I’m hoping for Tony Basil.

As I’ve mentioned already the action quota is seriously ramped up here, with numerous attack scenes, with the scenes involving the super sized Piranha attacking a coastal town proving to be especially insane, while at the same time never explaining why the buildings are exploding, when they are hit by the flying piranha. It’s also a shame that Forsberg can’t seem to hold his wad, with the majority of the attack scenes, as they often feel over filled are far too frantic especially during the town attack, which only further to highlight the questionable CGI effects, though if you’ve made it this far in the film, you’ve no doubt gotten used to them already. It’s also interesting to see the same power station used so liberally in “Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus” once again appear here in similar style scenes, with the interior once again doubling for a submarine interior. I’m not sure what is so special about this location, but they sure get their money’s worth, seeing how it’s adapted once again, to fill so many roles.

Personally I felt that it overstayed it’s welcome towards the end and could have done with some trimming in places, but then I was attempting to watch it solo and the films of “The Asylum” always work best when watched with a few friends, some cold beers and some really low expectations, conditions under which I might have found it more enjoyable. Still in the meantime “The Asylum” machine rolls on and although they might be largely awful not only in terms of effects, but acting ability, I still at the same time have no doubt that this will not be last time I watch one of their movies, only here’s hoping next time I’m not so sober, when I try to do it!

It's Alive

Title: It’s Alive
Director: Larry Cohen
Released: 1974
Staring: John P Ryan, Sharon Farrell, James Dixon, William Wellman Jr., Daniel Holzman1

Rating: 3 / 5

Plot: When the Davis’s baby is born, it turns out that it is far from an innocent bundle of joy, especially as this baby has quite a taste for human flesh.

Review: For regular readers of the blog, you will know already that I am expecting my first child next year, which has proven to be quite a surreal experience knowing that you’re going to be someone’s dad, all the more so during a recent scan, which also made me want to dig out this first film in the cult trilogy, all the more so with the recent remake, being treated to a severe critical mauling, like so many of the unnecessary remakes which have appeared in recent years, especially when you consider that it’s so much easier, to cash in on a franchise than starting a new one.
Originally deemed a flop upon its release, the film would only later find its audience on VHS, thanks largely to a clever marketing campaign, which like the film itself teased at the monstrous appearance of the baby, which is actually a smart move by Cohen, who it seems may have also had doubts about his monstrous baby, especially seeing how the baby is only shown in brief glimpses with the majority of shots throughout the film consisting of either it’s deformed claw like hand, or its fanged mouth, with Rick Baker being responsible for these effects and seeing how he only had a small budget, the effects are the majority of the time quite effective, even if they pale when compared to his later work.
The idea of a killer baby is typical of Cohen’s work, especially seeing how he prefers to take an everyday situation / object and putting a horror slant on it, often drawing inspiration from the most random of places, even proving that even Yogurt can be scary with “The Stuff” (1985). With this film Cohen looked at the world around him and the effects that it could have on an unborn child, with the frequent uses of pesticides and chemicals as well as the effects of birth control medication and surprisingly, it’s this world that Cohen chooses to focus on throughout the film, rather than making the baby the main focus, which is kind of what I expected, were as it soon becomes more of a study of the strains of parental responsibility, with Cohen especially focusing on it’s effects on Frank Davis (Ryan) who at the start of the film is excited about the birth of the baby, only for these emotions to quickly to be replaced with feelings of disgust for the new born child, showing little if any emotion for the child and more than happy to encourage the police to kill the child, while meanwhile the doctors and drug companies are also just as eager to destroy the child, to prevent any possible backlash. All of this adds up to an interesting look at humanity as a whole and how self preservation, often plays an important role. Something especially examined with the actions of the child, who from the outset might be killing at any given opportunity and it basically does however Cohen still finds a motive for it’s action, especially as it gets closer to home, determined it seems to still be part of it’s family, even if that family is not overly keen to be reunited with it.
Surprisingly for a film which is at it’s heart a low budget horror, Cohen doesn’t feel the urge to rush any action, especially when it comes to the attack scenes, which are sporadic to say the least, with the body count falling short of anything resembling double features with the majority of these death occurring during the birth scene, which also proves to be the downfall of the film, as the remaineder of the film fails to compete with this memorable opening, which might be a tad disappointing to some viewers, especially those looking for a killer baby rampage, as it certainly is not here with Cohen more interested in examining the strains of the Davis family, as things grow increasingly more tense between them, with mother Lenore turning to the bottle as her coping mechanism, were as Frank struggles to hold his family together, with an almost permanent expression of grim determination on his face and this it has to be said slows the film down considerably and past the point in which the more casual viewers will be able to endure, who will no doubt have tuned out before the film reaches it’s climatic chase through the LA storm drains before ending on a cliff-hanger, which informs us that the nightmare might be far from over.

“It’s Alive” like so many of the 70’s horror classics is heavy on social commentary, including Abortion, Pharmaceutical side effects, as well as the deterioration of the family unit, all of which give plenty of material for the script to work with and it is one of the stronger aspects of the film and certainly something that is clearly missing from more recent horror films, which are often more concerned with easy scares and providing the audience with eye candy than actual issues and while Cohen might be as highly regarded as other directors from the same era such as Carpenter or Romero, but here is proves still to be a noteworthy director in the genre, even if it is largely a film comprised of more misfire than those of memorable horror.